HELP!! My best friend just asked me out!!

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navitus
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HELP!! My best friend just asked me out!!

Post by navitus » Thu Feb 19, 2009 11:39 pm

Dude!!!!!!!
There's this girl at work who i am great friends with and for a whole yr the people at the office kept teasing us that we should get married coz we r perfect for each other etc etc.

So finally tonite, out of the blue she asks me out!!
I simply do not see her like that, am not attracted to her at all.
Now its gonna weird between us right ? I feel sorry for her, she was sad and felt rejected.
But i just don't like her in that way. And there is no way i can tell her SHE's NOT MY TYPE!!!!
What do i do, she is now asking for a reason why i wont........
Any advice ?

hacktheplanet
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Post by hacktheplanet » Thu Feb 19, 2009 11:42 pm

Easy: "I'm sorry, I just want to be friends. I think that it would damage our friendship if we started dating each other. Your friendship is more important to me than a relationship would be."

or else be like "yo bitch you ugly like hell i'd date a skank like you"
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gaijin1717
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Post by gaijin1717 » Thu Feb 19, 2009 11:43 pm

Or how about, "Because I'm afraid that if we start seeing each other it may adversely affect my relationship with your mom."

john doe by choice
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Post by john doe by choice » Thu Feb 19, 2009 11:48 pm

Best excuse: "I've been seeing someone on and off for a while - it's off right now, but still pretty complicated/I'm not ready to start that again." pretty much the end of the conversation, right there.

other excuses:

"I'm gay"

"I have (insert std here)"

"My baby's momma is awful jealous, e'en tho we don't date no mo"

or find out what she's allergic to and proclaim your love for it

Machinesworking
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Re: HELP!! My best friend just asked me out!!

Post by Machinesworking » Thu Feb 19, 2009 11:52 pm

My advice is don't become friends with women that make sexy eyes at you occasionally. After a year there's no way around the fact you knew there was some sexual tension there, but enjoyed the attention.
Be honest with her, and admit you're a vagina tease, that you're selfish and that she's not pretty enough for your standards. OK maybe don't tell her that, but let it be known that you're far too narcissistic for her, that you would just be an awful boyfriend.

Also, if it "works out" and you're still "friends" if you sense she's still pinning, cut it off. The best way is to make yourself into a douche bag, let her see you as less than her in value. At least then she won't come out as hurt.

This is why I prefer my platonic girlfriends to be dating my guy friends who are faithful. Hanging with single straight girls as a single straight guy, looks healthy and "mature" on paper but IRL it's always messy at some point.
Last edited by Machinesworking on Thu Feb 19, 2009 11:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.

jonny72
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Re: HELP!! My best friend just asked me out!!

Post by jonny72 » Thu Feb 19, 2009 11:53 pm

navitus wrote:Any advice ?
Didn't you even bang it once?

Seriously, be honest - tell her you like her as friends but don't have any other feelings for her. If you drag it out and start coming up with some cock and bull excuse you are only going to make things worse.
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sven303
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Post by sven303 » Fri Feb 20, 2009 12:04 am

I think youve probably lost her as a friend....no matter what you come up with

The 'I just wanna be friends thing' is gonna make her feel rejected and embarressed, and will probably avoid you like the plague.

How about come up with some excuse that your already seeing someone but been keeping it secret.

Or if your any good at acting, start getting really heavy with her saying you want like 10 kids right away, lets buy a house, lets do it lets go to Las Vegas right now!!!....hoepfully she will run a mile

or explain that your a rent boy in the evenings and just check that she is ok with you sleeping with guys for cash.....

Tough day in the office for you tomorrow!!!

kb420
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Re: HELP!! My best friend just asked me out!!

Post by kb420 » Fri Feb 20, 2009 12:10 am

navitus wrote:Dude!!!!!!!
There's this girl at work who i am great friends with and for a whole yr the people at the office kept teasing us that we should get married coz we r perfect for each other etc etc.

So finally tonite, out of the blue she asks me out!!
I simply do not see her like that, am not attracted to her at all.
Now its gonna weird between us right ? I feel sorry for her, she was sad and felt rejected.
But i just don't like her in that way. And there is no way i can tell her SHE's NOT MY TYPE!!!!
What do i do, she is now asking for a reason why i wont........
Any advice ?

If she was really your best friend, you would have just gone out with her once, and then found a better way to let her know how you felt without crushing her feelings.
H20nly wrote:fuck Bitwig.

leedsquietman
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Post by leedsquietman » Fri Feb 20, 2009 12:32 am

Hey. Hey Live forum doubles up as Dear Deirdre/ Dear Marjorie column.

unless you're some kind of hot shit stud (98.99999% of men are not), maybe lower your standards and give her a date anyway. Do you actually have a girlfriend (If you did that wouldn't stop most men) ? You might find that you like dating her - and if it doesn't work out, you can blame it on her for coming on to you when you just wanted to be friends.

This is why that old adage men can't be friends with women rings true (99% of men just want to test drive it in the sack, attractive or not because of animal urges) - you can be 'friendly' with women but let them into your life like you would a male friend and it will always be a disaster, the only time having a good female friend works is when that female is into other women And then if you're really lucky, you might get invited to sample the girlie loving.
Last edited by leedsquietman on Fri Feb 20, 2009 12:33 am, edited 1 time in total.
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stonee
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Post by stonee » Fri Feb 20, 2009 12:33 am

as said, straight guys can't be friends with girls without there being tension at some point.
a good guy friend knows to let these feelings pass over time, and get back to normal.

I've been through it many times.


the whole, we should be freinds thing, even though its true, sounds like a cop out. definitly some think ice your on.

personally, I would explain it like its been said above.

also, instead of saying "i think we'd be better as a friend" use words like valued, and important.
DON'T tell her she's not your type. she'll instantly feel undesirable.

tell her that her friendship with you is a lot more valuable than something that could potentially just be some passing sexual tension. stuff like this is completely normal in such friendships, and usually will pass with time. The cat is out of the bag now, so you'll just have to fight through the awkwardness for a while.



however, in one case, I let it boil over, and it actually worked out really well. probably one of the least regretful relationships I've ever had.
think about it, if your good friends with someone, you know you can spend lots of time with that person without them driving you nuts. a good amount of that initial akwardness in a relationship is already dealt with, and you already know they're problems and how to deal with them.



or just go out with her and pretend your super premature :lol:

john gordon
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Post by john gordon » Fri Feb 20, 2009 12:59 am

does she have a nice butt?

funky shit
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Post by funky shit » Fri Feb 20, 2009 1:08 am

stick it in her pooper
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mikemc
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Post by mikemc » Fri Feb 20, 2009 2:02 am

You need a reply that is positive, but at the same time causes her to change her mind:

"I'd love to, I am a master of shibari, and I've been seeking just the right subject."
"I'd love to. I've always admired the fact that, for a fat girl, you don't sweat too much."
"I'd love to. Uhm, not to be presumptious, but we've known each other for a while: if the evening were to turn intimate, would you mind wearing a furry mask?"

gunforhire
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Post by gunforhire » Fri Feb 20, 2009 2:33 am

I'd love to get to know the outcome of this story!

gurumonkey
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Post by gurumonkey » Fri Feb 20, 2009 2:54 am

hire a hot girl to be your accomplice.

you go to work and start to tell her real nice and sweet that you're not so sure about it...

time hot girl. she comes in a few minutes later, gives you a big smooch, says, "hi honey, who is this?"

bam.

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