WTF Vs. Women

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d.reamonn
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Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:24 pm

WTF Vs. Women

Post by d.reamonn » Thu Mar 17, 2011 4:54 pm

Why do all my SMS exchanges with girls go like this?
ME ca te dit qu'on aille bruler le synagogue ce w.e?

GIRL Au delà du fait que je ne brule que les églises protestantes descaralisées, qui es tu?

ME l'alpha, l'omega et la barbe à Spooner. je suis un concept. rendez-vous ce soir dans la chatte-à-ta-mère, si tu veux connaitre la vérité.

GIRL J'aimerai mieux qu'on se donne rendez vous dans ton cul.

ME pas si vite Fraulein, je ne suis pas ce genre de fille. noix de cajou?

GIRL C'est bien dommage, tu commençais presque à m'intriguer.

GIRL Pour la noix de cajou, je te renvoie aux derniers mots de mon avant dernier message.

ME il faudrait que j'etrangle combien de chiots pour que tu me fist l'urètre?

GIRL Viens me voir, que je puisse te montrer.

ME est ce que tu as tous les accessoires?

GIRL Fais gaffe, tu commences déjà à m'ennuyer.

ME 8=========D
After this back and forth she called me up (ASCII penis win). Of course, once she realized who I was, she quickly hung up. :x
Last edited by d.reamonn on Thu Mar 17, 2011 7:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

MacGuffin
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Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by MacGuffin » Thu Mar 17, 2011 6:58 pm

8O

:lol:

beats me
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Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2007 6:39 pm

Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by beats me » Thu Mar 17, 2011 7:11 pm

Women own all the vaginas. :x

xrayfish
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Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by xrayfish » Thu Mar 17, 2011 8:18 pm

Is it because you is French?

sporkles
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Location: Schmocation

Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by sporkles » Thu Mar 17, 2011 8:40 pm

Well, if Google Translate is any indication, I'd say both you and the women you text are pretty much certifiable, which answers your question.

mikemc
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Location: Maryland USA

Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by mikemc » Thu Mar 17, 2011 9:00 pm

hmmm "cashews"... that's gotta be something different....

:lol:
UTENZIL a tool... of the muse.

mikemc
Posts: 5455
Joined: Mon Jun 21, 2004 2:14 pm
Location: Maryland USA

Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by mikemc » Thu Mar 17, 2011 9:13 pm

i guess i should probably put this here, too:

http://soundcloud.com/utenzil/ledamedelametropole
UTENZIL a tool... of the muse.

d.reamonn
Posts: 1176
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:24 pm

Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by d.reamonn » Thu Mar 17, 2011 10:55 pm

I'm not French, I'm just confused.

English girls, on the other hand, are something else. They all look as if they were born with ballsacks of makeup pre-applied, yet somehow manage to maintain a consistently fat and unfuckworthy physique. Put simply, they've got nowhere to go. Other girls generally slap on some rouge, and make like they're still worth the occasional short distance cab fare, but those Brit birds are just plain outta options when it comes to pimping their poon. Ugly fucking chubweasels, the lot of them.

Noix de cajou.

beats me
Posts: 23319
Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2007 6:39 pm

Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by beats me » Fri Mar 18, 2011 2:12 pm

d.reamonn wrote:I'm not French, I'm just confused.

English girls, on the other hand, are something else. They all look as if they were born with ballsacks of makeup pre-applied, yet somehow manage to maintain a consistently fat and unfuckworthy physique. Put simply, they've got nowhere to go. Other girls generally slap on some rouge, and make like they're still worth the occasional short distance cab fare, but those Brit birds are just plain outta options when it comes to pimping their poon. Ugly fucking chubweasels, the lot of them.

Noix de cajou.
I don’t know how true all that is, but the delivery was ace and deserves the full :lol:

zsazsa
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Joined: Wed Feb 09, 2005 4:31 pm
Location: Deventer

Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by zsazsa » Mon Mar 21, 2011 3:40 pm

because my french is pretty bad i put your text in babelfish:
ME Ca tells you qu' one will burn the synagogue this w.e?
GIRL Beyond the fact that I flaring only the descaralized Protestant churches, which are you?
ME l' alpha, l' Omega and the beard with Spooner. I am a concept. appointment this evening in the she-cat-with-your-mother, if you want to know the truth.
GIRL J' will like qu' better; one is given return in your bottom.
ME not so quickly Fraulein, I am not this kind of girl. cashew nut? GIRL C' is well damage, you started almost with m' to intrigue.
GIRL For cashew nut, I return you to the last words of my before last message.
ME it would be necessary that j' strangle how much pups so that you me fist l' urethra?
GIRL Come to see me, that I can show you. Is to
ME what you have all the accessories?
GIRL to, you Pay start already with m' to annoy. ME 8=========D
I still think my french is bad.

d.reamonn
Posts: 1176
Joined: Mon Jan 19, 2009 9:24 pm

Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by d.reamonn » Mon Mar 21, 2011 3:53 pm

Translation:

ME wanna go burn down the synagogue this weekend?
GIRL Other than the fact that I only burn down Protestant churches, who are you?
ME the alpha, the omega, and Spooner's beard. i am a concept. meet me in your-momma's-pussy, if you want to know the truth .
GIRL I'd rather we see each other in your ass.
ME not so fast Fraulein, i'm not that kinda girl. cashew nut?
GIRL That's a shame, you were beginning to intrigue me.
GIRL As for the cashew nut, see the last words of my previous message.
ME how many puppies must i strangle for you to fist my urethra?
GIRL Come see me, I'll show you.
ME do you have all the accessories?
GIRL Careful now, you're growing tiresome.
ME 8=========D

H20nly
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Location: The Wild West

Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by H20nly » Mon Mar 21, 2011 6:02 pm

Image
LoopStationZebra wrote:it's like a hipster commie pinko manifesto. Rambling. Angry. Nearly divorced from all reality; yet strangely compelling with a ring of truth.

timothyallan
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Re: WTF Vs. Women

Post by timothyallan » Tue Mar 22, 2011 2:17 am

you had me at "fist my urethra"

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