My FAKE Complaint About Robert Henke

[thelike5]

This letter has three main sections. In the first, I argue that Mr. Robert Henke is clearly exasperated by the limitations that have thus far denied him the ability to tip the scales in his favor. In the second, I make it clear that I undeniably hope that his punishment fits his crime. And in the third and final section, I conclude that his legatees will leave us high and dry as they turn us into easy prey for unsympathetic publishers of hate literature. Perhaps before going on, I should describe Mr. Henke to you. Mr. Henke is unconscionable, intellectually challenged, and mentally deficient. Furthermore, he yearns to shove the Ableton nation towards Chekism.

Although this may come as a surprise to some readers, Mr. Henke's hypocrisy is transparent. Even the least discerning among us can see right through it. If Mr. Henke doesn't realize that it's generally considered bad style to foment revolting forms of political tyranny, then he should read one of the many self-help books on the subject. I recommend he buy one with big print and lots of pictures. Maybe then Mr. Henke will grasp the concept that if he wants to complain, he should have an argument. He shouldn't just throw out the word "counterrevolutionist", for example, and expect us to be scared. Although he occasionally exhibits a passable simulacrum of rationality, Mr. Henke contends that he can override nature. Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from?

I don't believe I violate any confidences when I assert that Mr. Henke's assertions are designed to respond to this letter with hyperbolic and uncorroborated accusations and assaults on free speech. And they're working; they're having the desired effect. There is no excuse for the innumerable errors of fact, the slovenly and philistine artistic judgments, the historical ineptitude, the internal contradictions, and the various half-truths, untruths, and gussied-up truths that litter every one of Mr. Henke's essays from the first word to the last. My eventual goal for this letter is to take steps against the whole contumacious brotherhood of hostile, nasty dips. I'm counting on you for your support.


http://www.pakin.org/complaint/

C'mon man. First you are going to post about how the guys at Ableton during NAMM weren't nice enough to you now this??!

Get another hobby or go back to raising your AK-47 in praise of Allah in Fallujah.

[Tone Deft]

C'mon man. First you are going to post about how the guys at Ableton during NAMM weren't nice enough to you now this??!

Get another hobby or go back to raising your AK-47 in praise of Allah in Fallujah.

http://www.pakin.org/complaint/

I don't get the Fallujah comment.

[thelike5]

C'mon man. First you are going to post about how the guys at Ableton during NAMM weren't nice enough to you now this??!

Get another hobby or go back to raising your AK-47 in praise of Allah in Fallujah.

http://www.pakin.org/complaint/

Yeah, I really don't get it nor do I care enough to figure it out...

[Tone Deft]

C'mon man. First you are going to post about how the guys at Ableton during NAMM weren't nice enough to you now this??!

Get another hobby or go back to raising your AK-47 in praise of Allah in Fallujah.

http://www.pakin.org/complaint/

Yeah, I really don't get it nor do I care enough to figure it out...

oops, just did a quick edit on my previous post, I don't get your Fallujah comment, did I miss something?

[nebulae]

C'mon man. First you are going to post about how the guys at Ableton during NAMM weren't nice enough to you now this??!

Get another hobby or go back to raising your AK-47 in praise of Allah in Fallujah.

I'm so glad you remember things I wrote seven months ago. You really ought not give me that much credit, especially since I won't remember you five minutes from now...even the Fallujah gaffe.

[roby]

oh dear

[nebulae]

It's ok, I've made an edit in the first post to clarify my position.

[nebulae]

Yeah, I really don't get it nor do I care enough to figure it out...

Yeeehaaaaaaaaa! Let's go eat a steak! USA USA USA!

[Pasha]

For all you morons out there who don't get it...THIS IS NOT A REAL COMPLAINT...it was autogenerated by http://www.pakin.org/complaint/ and it's supposed to be FUN FUN.

This letter has three main sections. In the first, I argue that Mr. Robert Henke is clearly exasperated by the limitations that have thus far denied him the ability to tip the scales in his favor. In the second, I make it clear that I undeniably hope that his punishment fits his crime. And in the third and final section, I conclude that his legatees will leave us high and dry as they turn us into easy prey for unsympathetic publishers of hate literature. Perhaps before going on, I should describe Mr. Henke to you. Mr. Henke is unconscionable, intellectually challenged, and mentally deficient. Furthermore, he yearns to shove the Ableton nation towards Chekism.

Although this may come as a surprise to some readers, Mr. Henke's hypocrisy is transparent. Even the least discerning among us can see right through it. If Mr. Henke doesn't realize that it's generally considered bad style to foment revolting forms of political tyranny, then he should read one of the many self-help books on the subject. I recommend he buy one with big print and lots of pictures. Maybe then Mr. Henke will grasp the concept that if he wants to complain, he should have an argument. He shouldn't just throw out the word "counterrevolutionist", for example, and expect us to be scared. Although he occasionally exhibits a passable simulacrum of rationality, Mr. Henke contends that he can override nature. Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from?

I don't believe I violate any confidences when I assert that Mr. Henke's assertions are designed to respond to this letter with hyperbolic and uncorroborated accusations and assaults on free speech. And they're working; they're having the desired effect. There is no excuse for the innumerable errors of fact, the slovenly and philistine artistic judgments, the historical ineptitude, the internal contradictions, and the various half-truths, untruths, and gussied-up truths that litter every one of Mr. Henke's essays from the first word to the last. My eventual goal for this letter is to take steps against the whole contumacious brotherhood of hostile, nasty dips. I'm counting on you for your support.

Man, you're absolutely fantastic!

[Aequitas123]

For all you morons out there who don't get it...THIS IS NOT A REAL COMPLAINT...it was autogenerated by http://www.pakin.org/complaint/ and it's supposed to be FUN FUN.

This letter has three main sections. In the first, I argue that Mr. Robert Henke is clearly exasperated by the limitations that have thus far denied him the ability to tip the scales in his favor. In the second, I make it clear that I undeniably hope that his punishment fits his crime. And in the third and final section, I conclude that his legatees will leave us high and dry as they turn us into easy prey for unsympathetic publishers of hate literature. Perhaps before going on, I should describe Mr. Henke to you. Mr. Henke is unconscionable, intellectually challenged, and mentally deficient. Furthermore, he yearns to shove the Ableton nation towards Chekism.

Although this may come as a surprise to some readers, Mr. Henke's hypocrisy is transparent. Even the least discerning among us can see right through it. If Mr. Henke doesn't realize that it's generally considered bad style to foment revolting forms of political tyranny, then he should read one of the many self-help books on the subject. I recommend he buy one with big print and lots of pictures. Maybe then Mr. Henke will grasp the concept that if he wants to complain, he should have an argument. He shouldn't just throw out the word "counterrevolutionist", for example, and expect us to be scared. Although he occasionally exhibits a passable simulacrum of rationality, Mr. Henke contends that he can override nature. Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from?

I don't believe I violate any confidences when I assert that Mr. Henke's assertions are designed to respond to this letter with hyperbolic and uncorroborated accusations and assaults on free speech. And they're working; they're having the desired effect. There is no excuse for the innumerable errors of fact, the slovenly and philistine artistic judgments, the historical ineptitude, the internal contradictions, and the various half-truths, untruths, and gussied-up truths that litter every one of Mr. Henke's essays from the first word to the last. My eventual goal for this letter is to take steps against the whole contumacious brotherhood of hostile, nasty dips. I'm counting on you for your support.

So whats your problem with Henke?

[nebulae]

So whats your problem with Henke?

Absolutely none...the guy is entirely inspirational, totally loveable, and frankly, one of my musical heroes.

Please let me know if I need to spell it out further. I mean let's take all the fun out of this gag entirely. That's the ticket!

[glitchrock-buddha]

So whats your problem with Henke?

Absolutely none...the guy is entirely inspirational, totally loveable, and frankly, one of my musical heroes.

So then why are you complaining about him? I don't get it. Chill out man, sheesh...

[Aequitas123]

So whats your problem with Henke?

Absolutely none...the guy is entirely inspirational, totally loveable, and frankly, one of my musical heroes.

Please let me know if I need to spell it out further. I mean let's take all the fun out of this gag entirely. That's the ticket!

I just dont get it, what has he ever done to you?















pwnd, noob

[nebulae]

I just dont get it, what has he ever done to you?

Well, bald people just plain piss me off. It was time they were dealt with.

[nebulae]

So then why are you complaining about him? I don't get it. Chill out man, sheesh...

And Canadians piss me off too. Them and their smug happiness and their bacon. That's the worst!