Ableton Forum

marky wrote:drinking is my reward for when I'm done!

Hope there is a well sorted bar in heaven

Well, reward is fine. But for some, like me, you may end up "rewarding" yourself for having made that phone call etc - a downward staircase of rewards.

// C

conny wrote: Hope there is a well sorted bar in heaven

I meant done writing a track, not done breathing !!

conny wrote: Well, reward is fine. But for some, like me, you may end up "rewarding" yourself for having made that phone call etc - a downward staircase of rewards.

// C

Conny, I understand. Best of luck with it all! Once you get used to writing sober, you'll wonder how you ever did it whilst drinking I'm sure.

marky wrote:I love a good bevvy (I'm Scottish after all!) but I really can't make music when I'm drinking. I end up getting really excited about a riff and have another driknk... and lay stuff down and drink some more, stick some beats down (drink some more).. start planning out the arrangement (and drink another)... and I head to bed thinking I've just had a really productive night sticking down some ace new track...

... then check it again in the morning and it's crap!

I always write and work sober.. drinking is my reward for when I'm done!

see this is how it was getting more and more for me until I was just sitting in front of the computer trying to keep my eyes open - every night when I had lots of free time not so much going to bed as collapsing into it - strong espresso stopped working

thinking every single night this is so fucking ridiculous, but coming back next night, sitting down, thinking "where do I start" and then just having a bong then starting to get ideas but getting a little side tracked by the big green paranoid weed fairy, so I go and open a beer and get on a really nice buzz for maybe up to 3 pints - but by the third the drowsyness starts to sttle in so I go and get a strong coffee which sets the heartbeat pumping, but makes the anxious paranoid feeling worse so I go and get another beer

so before long the whole night is centered around the next substance

and it started so well - that's the vicious cycle of it that the 1st couple actually did seem to work - got me relaxed and excited by the music, but it just didnt last long and had an acumulative effect so I could never get back to that first buzz

just writing this out makes me feel so stupid - it reminds me how important writing your thoughts out is - I used to keep a journal as a teenager and I just might have to start again - it can help you organise your thoughts really well

RE: the inspiration thing

Einstein:" genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration"

Picasso: "inspiration exists but it has to find you working"

forge, understand that vicious cycle of substances to rid you of the nasty effects of pot or alcohol (drowsiness etc). Coffee seems to work for a while, but then again it puts you on your ass within' the first hour of drinking it if you've been drinkin' coffee for a while.

I usually write a lot of my tracks while stoned and for the most part it works. What is important I think is finding that balance...get your exercise, eat healthy, find other activities throughout the day to keep your attention. Also, try alternatives for getting the pick me up. I eat ginseng and that seems to help with my energy levels staying up and also a cup of yerba mate tea can reall invigorate the spirit.

I need to seriously stop puffin' up, but I find it helps so much. Not just with writing music, but even studying for my classes. Then again, maybe I'm ADHD and doja is just my adderall.

zfigz wrote:
I need to seriously stop puffin' up, but I find it helps so much. Not just with writing music, but even studying for my classes. Then again, maybe I'm ADHD and doja is just my adderall.

Word, I totally agre...

Oh look at that butterfly!

zfigz wrote:....
I need to seriously stop puffin' up, but I find it helps so much. Not just with writing music, but even studying for my classes. Then again, maybe I'm ADHD and doja is just my adderall.

yeah, that's the thing - I have to take my asthma puffer every day, get wheezy, short of breath going up stairs - it's something I've known for a while I really shouldnt be doing - but same as you, I just love listening to and making music stoned - it's like entering some parallel universe

ah well maybe after so many years I'll be able to do it sober

forge wrote:

marky wrote:I love a good bevvy (I'm Scottish after all!) but I really can't make music when I'm drinking. I end up getting really excited about a riff and have another driknk... and lay stuff down and drink some more, stick some beats down (drink some more).. start planning out the arrangement (and drink another)... and I head to bed thinking I've just had a really productive night sticking down some ace new track...

... then check it again in the morning and it's crap!

I always write and work sober.. drinking is my reward for when I'm done!

see this is how it was getting more and more for me until I was just sitting in front of the computer trying to keep my eyes open - every night when I had lots of free time not so much going to bed as collapsing into it - strong espresso stopped working

thinking every single night this is so fucking ridiculous, but coming back next night, sitting down, thinking "where do I start" and then just having a bong then starting to get ideas but getting a little side tracked by the big green paranoid weed fairy, so I go and open a beer and get on a really nice buzz for maybe up to 3 pints - but by the third the drowsyness starts to sttle in so I go and get a strong coffee which sets the heartbeat pumping, but makes the anxious paranoid feeling worse so I go and get another beer

so before long the whole night is centered around the next substance

and it started so well - that's the vicious cycle of it that the 1st couple actually did seem to work - got me relaxed and excited by the music, but it just didnt last long and had an acumulative effect so I could never get back to that first buzz

just writing this out makes me feel so stupid - it reminds me how important writing your thoughts out is - I used to keep a journal as a teenager and I just might have to start again - it can help you organise your thoughts really well

RE: the inspiration thing

Einstein:" genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration"

Picasso: "inspiration exists but it has to find you working"

Forge, yeah I hear you. I got into the same kind of loop for a while myself, but I wasn't writing any music at that point .. it was a whole 4 years I did nothin musically and it pains me to think of what I could have achieved if I hadn't stopped at that period.

I was into everything too, plus the bevvy. And I had my studio set up in my apartment and would sometimes try to do something wasted. But whilst your creativity sometimes jumps in altered states, you're productivity NEVER jumps up .. as you'll wander off doing other stuff and never get a track done.

Best of luck boss!

forge wrote: ah well maybe after so many years I'll be able to do it sober

Ofcourse you can, you are still you I hope and intelligence and ability can never be in the drug! It may trigger things that are inside you. Now we have to learn how to do it "on our own".
Says dr C.

Had some bad cravings in the afternoon today, obcessed by thoughts and images and memories of sweet beer... very near to give in "for just this day". Went swimming, and it cooled me down enough.

Yesterday night I had some hours with tea and trying to learn how to program Crystal. It was OK, even did some drone things that might become a tune. And, as a difference, the work done feels interesting even today!

// C

conny wrote:

forge wrote:

Yesterday night I had some hours with tea and trying to learn how to program Crystal. It was OK, even did some drone things that might become a tune. And, as a difference, the work done feels interesting even today!

// C

Now thas wha I'm talkin about. Hold onto that appreciation and realize how important that is.

conny wrote:

forge wrote: ah well maybe after so many years I'll be able to do it sober

Ofcourse you can, you are still you I hope and intelligence and ability can never be in the drug! It may trigger things that are inside you. Now we have to learn how to do it "on our own".
Says dr C.

Had some bad cravings in the afternoon today, obcessed by thoughts and images and memories of sweet beer... very near to give in "for just this day". Went swimming, and it cooled me down enough.

Yesterday night I had some hours with tea and trying to learn how to program Crystal. It was OK, even did some drone things that might become a tune. And, as a difference, the work done feels interesting even today!

// C

me too conny - yesterday was a bit tough going, seriously thinking "just one cant hurt" - but I remembered that in the past on those occasions what happens is as soon as you have that "just one" then it breaks your momentum and you're no longer on this personal challeng, so you very quickly go back to how you were.

This has been my realisation more and more of why you do have to abstain - at least until it no longer rules your thoughts -

I've been realising this is why it is an addiction - because I have actually physically been feeling really good - better than when I drink every day but the desire still comes and it is mental - so that is an addiction

Also, I've found I've been having alot of sweet things and chocolate - from brewing beer and seeing just how much sugar is in it I'm wondering how much of the addiction is sugar.

Last night I dreamt about wine, I only had one sip and felt really guilty, then my mother threw it out and I was annoyed at her

then I had a beer by the sink and my step father put the filthy washing up sponge in it and I took it out to drink it...weird dreams eh?

Forge you're right on with the sugar link. You need L-Glutamine (an amino acid, commonly taken by body builders actually!) Take 500-1000mg

Two weeks.
I'm losing weight!
Tea is pouring out my ears.
Physical condition feels better.

The thoughts still come, wanting to give in for a short while.

A goal: Saving to an Edirol recorder and sofrware updates.

// C

conny wrote:Two weeks.
I'm losing weight!
Tea is pouring out my ears.
Physical condition feels better.

The thoughts still come, wanting to give in for a short while.

A goal: Saving to an Edirol recorder and sofrware updates.

// C

Excellent! Keep it up!

conny wrote:Two weeks.
I'm losing weight!
Tea is pouring out my ears.
Physical condition feels better.
// C

i think that how good you're feeling
is all the support you need...
nonetheless, to you sir i say:
Congratulations!

Hey Conny, cool mate. Save the money, you'll be glad right ?
"flow, my tears, the policeman said" >>> that's actually the title of my prefered Philip K. Dick book. Get it if you got a chance !

Congrats to you too Forge. I am myself still nicotint free... feels great !
Looking forward to the next camp, tea and gums !

Cheers,
amo