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Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 5:43 am
by ThrowAway
I had today off and I thought I would go see one of my friends who works at a mall in my town. So Im taking my time driving there, going the speed limit when I come behind a grandma driver. I check my blind spot and see theres a red porsche cayman two car lengthes behind me so I start to merge and at the same time theres a pause of silence on my radio because the cd is in between songs so I hear this dipshit floor his car and in a second his next to me and im 25% in his lane. I back off cause im not in a rush, give him the finger and chill, thinking to myself if he pulls in a gas station on my route to where im going ill follow him in and say something but fuck it Im on a mini vacation and its not a big deal. I am behind him awhile then get back into my original lane not 10 minutes later he does the same thing to civic with a woman and two kids in the car but she doesnt hear his "custom exhaust" and they smash each other with him ending up on the curb hitting some kind of sign going im guessing with the accleration 50mph. Im livid. Im seeing red. I actually said in my mind i hope that motherfuckers dead. I pull over jump out and check the woman and children and they are ok besides being shaken up and confused. I explain to her what he did and he just did it to me just previously and she get pissed and starts to get out. At this point he got out of his car and over heard what I had said and then shouted I was a liar. I lunged at him and told him "get back in your car, you curly headed fuck" and after he tripped over himself and got back in the car I asked him What kind of dick bag puts an exhaust on a porsche ?....After all is said in done he received a bunch of tickets, his car is totaled he probably went to jail after I left and I got the phone number to the woman who was driving driving her niece and nephew around. To top all this off the kids father is a state prosecutor who works in the area. I laughed about this for hours. this has to be one of my most memorable birthdays of my life. Quoting will ferrell in front of a hot chick whos obsessed with his movies is great but doing it and making somebody shit their pants at the same time is indescribably entertaining. I talked to her tonight for a little while and she wants to go out and celebrate with me and my friends on friday night keep you fingers crossed for my and hope that I end a 4 month dry spell.
Edit- Her car was fine besides damage to the right rear corner lights and bumper
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 6:54 am
by LeifonMars
Glad I made you happy, pal, but let me tell you my story. I was in a hurry, because the granny, you took over, was my granny and I had just received a phone call from a mental institution where she's been treated for mental illness for several decades now, and they said this time it was for real, she was going to do it. I was the only person in the world, who could sooth her out. And I say I was, because by the time I got there (after the police had beaten me to intensive care condition because the father of those children you mentioned, called to the station and insisted them to do so) my granny had already taken off. Yes, she was running amok on that highway.
And the exhaust, it was a gift from my granny, the last gift I'm ever gonna get from her.
hope your dick's gonna fall off
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:24 am
by jesQuick
LeifonMars wrote:Glad I made you happy, pal, but let me tell you my story. I was in a hurry, because the granny, you took over, was my granny and I had just received a phone call from a mental institution where she's been treated for mental illness for several decades now, and they said this time it was for real, she was going to do it. I was the only person in the world, who could sooth her out. And I say I was, because by the time I got there (after the police had beaten me to intensive care condition because the father of those children you mentioned, called to the station and insisted them to do so) my granny had already taken off. Yes, she was running amok on that highway.
And the exhaust, it was a gift from my granny, the last gift I'm ever gonna get from her.
hope your dick's gonna fall off
LOL
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 8:30 am
by UKRuss
There's nothing like preying on car crash victims for a date. Good work sah!

Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:36 pm
by Aequitas123
I ride a motorcycle and see this kind of driver everyday. Us riders get right pissed when someone cuts us off as its not our ride thats at stake but our life. Its nice to hear someone finally get what they deserve.
I applaud your fervor!
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:48 pm
by brightonalex
did he have curly hair?
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:53 pm
by forge
nice one
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 2:27 pm
by ThrowAway
brightonalex wrote:did he have curly hair?
yes he looked like a cross between bob from that 70s show and danny bonaduce.
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 2:28 pm
by ThrowAway
UKRuss wrote:There's nothing like preying on car crash victims for a date. Good work sah!

Ill take what I can get. It was either that or the sex addict support groups again

Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 3:00 pm
by OvertoneZero
Lol dude that story made my day
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 3:28 pm
by UKRuss
Anyway, good band name : 'dicks in porsches'
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 5:45 pm
by thelike5
Is the Mom divorced? Wy are you that stoked to meet a woman who has two kids?
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 5:57 pm
by LeifonMars
ThrowAway wrote:I got the phone number to the woman who was driving driving her niece and nephew around
thelike5 wrote:
Is the Mom divorced? Wy are you that stoked to meet a woman who has two kids?
Now, learn to pay attention.
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 6:02 pm
by dhilsabeck
nevermind
Re: Dicks in porsches
Posted: Tue Mar 31, 2009 6:24 pm
by Mr Man
not a porsche but yesterday had a guy right up my arse (not literally

so he passes me and then does the same to every car in front driving like 2-3 meters behind at 70 mph. Then about 30 mins down the road I see police lights on the hard shoulder. Gave him a wee toot on passing
