Ableton Forum

Not all douches drive a BMW, but all BMW drivers are douches. Is there some kind of gas that shoots out the air vents as soon as the engine starts that makes the driver feel important and indestructible? Maybe there’s low level subliminal “You are the best. You own the road. Laws and common courtesy don’t apply to you.” messages being played through the stereo at all times.

It's true, however Mercedes Benz drivers have been ramping it up as of late.

Meanwhile, ive always wanted a beemer. Perhaps it the douche inside fighting to get out.

Did somebody say VOLVO!?

infernal.machine wrote:Did somebody say VOLVO!?

You read my mind!
My theory is Volvo drivers don't buy them because they have great crash proof frames in case of a possible accident, but because they know they'll eventually be responsible for an accident and they want to survive it.

We've covered cars, SUV's are in their own class. With Cadillac and Ford leading the way! Go merka!

I can't quite believe it but I am looking at buying a Jeep!!! ...'pre-owned' of course



I need something I can get out of town in...go anywhere, which I can afford. Don't need pretentious, just practical. Anyone have any experience with these? The picture is of one I am actually looking at buying. 2006 Cherokee sport.

BMWs are rear wheel drive and have great handling. They've just flash enough to show you have a bit of money to spare, but not so much that anyone's going to be all that impressed.

So they are for people who want a really good driving experience. Basically people who drive like complete arseholes, with no regard for anyone else.

Now I've just made 2 car related posts in a row. What the hell's wrong with me?

Right, I'm going out boozing. Public transport, ftw

Thank goodness us Porsche owners aren't that way, Errrr, I mean VW owners, but I'd love to have a Porsche.

yeah I owned a porsche...ermmm vw beetle a while ago. Was great until the floor rusted out

My last car, just deceased, was a 1982 Mitsubishi Express Van which I owned for nearly 12 years (I got it for $1,300)...it was great: rear wheel drive just like a BMW hehe, and had a full long motor rebuild. I took that baby down many a rutted gravel road. She eventually succumbed to rust. I can't afford a new car, but I am going to reward myself with a not so old 4x4. I have always fancied going off to exotic locations off the tarmac and making music with battery powered devices. (forests and deserts come to mind.

So to keep marginally on topic...a 'Beemer' or similar car is just not practical. I don't think I have ever lusted after that kind of vehicle. Now a Ferrari ...THAT is another story

BMWs are a pleasure to drive, and their motorcycles have certain outstanding qualities as well.
I currently own neither -- don't care about cars, really, and I'm too much a cautious father to ride anymore.

Which direction does the arrow of causation point?

Do the douchey purchase BMWs, or do BMWs inspire a person to drive like a douche?

In my area, last week this drunk driver ran over an 11-year-old girl in front of her house and tried to split- but ended up wrecking and attempting to flee by foot. He was tackled by neighbors. Check out what he was driving...

beats me wrote:Not all douches drive a BMW, but all BMW drivers are douches. Is there some kind of gas that shoots out the air vents as soon as the engine starts that makes the driver feel important and indestructible? Maybe there’s low level subliminal “You are the best. You own the road. Laws and common courtesy don’t apply to you.” messages being played through the stereo at all times.

Quite possibly a simple hard-wired egalitarian emotion. Keep in mind also that Beamers, Mercs, etc. ain't quite Da Shit overseas where they're a dime a dozen.

I have always thought BMW drivers to be douchey but there is another group that deserves an honorable mention in any discussion of douchey drivers. I'm talking about the guys with the lifted Dodge Rams (could be any lifted truck, extra douche points for Rams) complete with monster logos and devil and angel slut stickers. Also one of those stupid obnoxious trailer balls that sticks way out. Takes up two parking spaces, doesn't even park straight, and sticks out beyond the parking space. I have even known these guys to park in the handicap space (with a placard in their mirror so they don't get a ticket) and get out and walk in just fine.
I worked with a guy with one of these trucks and one day we all went out to lunch in it. He had a diesel and whenever he pushed the gas pedal down a cloud of black smoke would come out of the exhaust pipe and he smoked this one guy out in smaller car with the window down as we passed him. How douchey is that?

currently going the Clark Griswold route with the minivan....kids in'shit.....
for my next vehicle I might go the sporty/active and absorbent tampon route with a Subaru.

aisling wrote:currently going the Clark Griswold route with the minivan....kids in'shit.....
for my next vehicle I might go the sporty/active and absorbent tampon route with a Subaru.

Ahhh, nothing like the Family Truckster. I hear you, when my son was born we bought a Dodge Caravan, now that he is grown up and driving we have sportier vehicles again.

BMW - The choice of assholes for years.

But this vintage BMW Isetta is a different story altogether...