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Ableton Live almost burned down my kitchen!!!

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 12:45 am
by M. Bréqs
Damn!

I put a pot of soup on the stove about an hour and a half ago, just to re-heat it. While it's heating, I naturally get bored (I hate cooking) and walk away, just for a minute... or so I think.

I sit down at the computer, which is in a seperate room. I had Live up and running before I went to get something to eat. So, I close the door (to keep noise out of the hallway), sit down, start jamming away, meanwhile the pot is still on - with a goddamned plastic ladel sticking out of it.

I'm bangin on the computer for about an hour, and then save my work. I open up Firefox just to check something, and start surfing some of the tunes that are linked in the the "post your music" forum on the Live forums.

I don't know what happened, but thank got Firefox froze my computer up. So, I force-shutdown, and then open the door to my office and...

...Something's stinky...

:!:

I go running back into the Kitchen, which is behind a glass french door. I can't see two feet into the kitchen because of the thick white smoke filling the entire room! I run in, and I'm overwhelmed by burnt food smell with melted plastic! The fumes were quite thick, probably toxic, and I had to get that pot off the stove.

8O

I wrap my hands (the plastic had partially melted off the handle and it was too hot to touch), pull it off, and throw it in the sink to cool it off with water. Immediately steam and more smoke come pouring out of the pot. I shut down the stove (which looks blackened around the element) and thank my lucky stars. I'm currently coughing and it feels like I have some wierd tightness in my throat and upper chest, probably from inhaling all those melted plastic fumes. Not cool.

I'm currently checking my drawers for fright induced turds as I type this.

Anyways, I curse Ableton for making such a goddamn engrossing product and having such a damn addictive forum.

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 12:48 am
by ekko
Dude, you could sue and totally own this place. :twisted:

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 12:59 am
by forge
:lol: :lol: :lol:

ahh classic!

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 1:03 am
by glitchrock-buddha
you're not alone.

Live, logic, and reason have all nearly burnt down my kitchen.

So have my turntables, my guitars, and even the shower for that matter...

grb

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 1:13 am
by M. Bréqs
Well, my female is out of town right now. Otherwise she would have noticed it naturally.

Actually, I probably wouldn't have been cooking if she was here, but that's another matter entirely.

(DJ Shiva please don't give me my what-for... I'm just kidding!) :wink:

Anyways, I called her to tell her the news, and I think she's going to put some sort of timer on my amp and monitors. Not good. The neighbours were all in the hallway wondering if the building was on fire, I had to explain that it's all out now.

How undignified. Ah well, at least I can vent on an anonymous forum!

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 5:08 am
by continuous
Great story (well written!)

I hate cooking as well. I love to eat good food, but not every meal.

The space pill will be my friend some day. Space pill - space pill - nice hot meal - space pill - smoothie etc.

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 9:34 am
by Mk
i had a similar experience with pillsbury crescent rolls... waiting for stuff from the oven is bad because I am constantly working in live... that's why i eat so much take-out now...

next there will be a little timer that you can pull off of your oven and take it with you around the house, because i even set the chime, but what good is that when your doing a mixdown or recording a set...

if you produce this feature for an oven, i want my cut... this forum is dated documentation...

8)

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 9:39 am
by jeskola
ive done this a couple of times, burnt holes in pots and pans
why oh why isnt there a midi controller with an egg timer on it yet :?

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 12:10 pm
by studio615
Uhh guys, you are sitting in front of a computer, it is the world's most powerful egg timer ever! Funny story though, I could see myself doing the same if I wasn't married. Glad you didn't burn the house down.

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 12:16 pm
by hoffman2k
Makes me wonder if there were ever any Ableton Live related casualty's :wink:

Notelba..... :twisted:

Glad you didn't burn the house down mate. I almost did it too once...

This will leave you with a neuroses though. "Did I leave the stove on?"
You'll find yourself checking that 4 times in a row, just to be sure.
Sometimes it'll drive you mad all day. When you're away from home..

Hehe, this wont happen that quickly again.

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 1:01 pm
by M. Bréqs
Well, despite ventilating my house all night it STILL smells wierd.

I'm not happy about that. My just punishment for being so absent minded I suppose.

Anyways, not only am I paranoid about the stove, I'm wondering if I left the door unlocked, the phone off the hook, the tap running, my fly open, the air conditioner running, the fridge door open, etc.

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 2:02 pm
by mikemc
Maybe we do a class action thing-- I have a teapot that looks like it's been through re-entry because of Live. :wink:

her: what is this? (indicating teapot)
me: what?
her: did you burn up this teapot?
me: no, it was like that.
her: you lying bastard, you were playing with your computer with that music stuff.
me: I wasn't playing...
her: f*ck you

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 2:15 pm
by icedsushi
I did it too last month!

Luckily it was only water on the stove boiling for noodles. I was playing with Live for about 15 minutes and I became tired that Monday night from lack of sleep (long fun weekend).

So I lied on my bed, exhausted, to rest "for only 5 minutes", I told myself. Zonk! Out cold (you know how that goes). I woke up about 4 hours later! Suddenly sprung out of bed, kind of rude awakening (remembering the water) & ran downstairs.

Of course all the water was gone from the pot and the gas burner had been full blast on the darn thing all night. The bottom of the pot was totally black inside and there were "heat waves" coming out of it like you see off the street in the hottest days of summer. Maybe I will throw it away. It's a shame to contribute the nice piece of cookware to the landfill, I just bought it. :oops: :lol:

I didn't get my gas bill yet. Wondering what the damage is... Oh man!

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 2:18 pm
by gaspode
M...

I think what you really ought to do is use a laptop in the kitchen and possibly get some form of timer.

I ruined a pot in a similar way, but was just boiling water and forgot about it for longer than the ten minutes I thought it would take to fix up a section of a track.

Was up in Montreal a few weeks back. My wife is bugging me to go back up there again because she wants to see if she can meet some more brazillians up there. Apparently it is *not* too cold up there for brazillians, at least not in the summer. I also think she wants to gamble at the casino up there.

Anyway... smokey says that only you can prevent ableton induced kitchen fires.

Greg

Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2006 2:33 pm
by Nic Synaes
[quote="hoffman2k"]Makes me wonder if there were ever any Ableton Live related casualty's quote]

leading to a host of moaning articles about addictive computer programs like the broadsheet press sprung on us all after that kid died from playing to much Everquest....