30 days sober

[beats me]

Part of the reason I'm going to AA is because I don't think just stopping the physical act of drinking covers the whole picture. That's actually the easy part, at least for me. I think it's a whole lifestyle change and that is something I haven't been able to do on my own.

When you binge drink and stop that leaves a lot of free time when you're mostly just going "well at least I'm not drinking". I've always had other things to do with that time like music, but obviously those other things didn't keep me from drinking because the draw to alcohol was more tempting. So I'm not going to find those things more exciting simply because I took alcohol out of the equation. I need a whole new mindset and friends that are going through or went through similar challenges.

Also I don't have a wife or kids and live with a drinker so there's no real authority figure or dependent that would be any kind of inspiration for me to not drink.

[3dot...]

http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/103665

http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/155157

[channelite]

It's amazing the amount of the world and reality I have seen since Jan 1997, when I stopped drinking. Stick to the suggestions of the club. I managed to stay stopped, by going to the club and taking their suggestions. It's been a great experience for me. Try to keep going everyday until you have 90 days, a day at a time of course.

[Rave]

Good for you fella, keep it up

[Machinesworking]

I've always had other things to do with that time like music, but obviously those other things didn't keep me from drinking because the draw to alcohol was more tempting. So I'm not going to find those things more exciting simply because I took alcohol out of the equation. I need a whole new mindset and friends that are going through or went through similar challenges.

On the contrary, not drinking means you wont decide to avoid the parts in the song writing process that you're uncomfortable with, unsure of, or are just a lot of work for you, and go out to the pub/club. If you even decide to spend 1/4 the time you spent drinking on music, there's no doubt your music will benefit from it greatly. Music is a lot of work at times for the most part, for mainly personal gain, so booze and the rest can tend to call out to people when you're stretching your boundaries.
AA is cool, but I've always thought it was definitely a "take what you can use and leave the rest" thing, some of the dogma should be buried in antiquity, not preached in modernity IMO. The best part of AA is basically having a peer group that actually cares if you don't drink, and will do "uncool" things with you like go to a coffee shop instead of a bar etc. Also a posse of people eventually to go to clubs with etc. that might prevent you from breaking down and drinking.

Good luck, I know I now look back and wonder WTF I was thinking that made it OK if even once a year I blacked out? or got into some stupid argument with my girlfriend drunk, or....

Also, about 3/4 of my friends still drink, it's not a black and white issue.

[beats me]

I've always had other things to do with that time like music, but obviously those other things didn't keep me from drinking because the draw to alcohol was more tempting. So I'm not going to find those things more exciting simply because I took alcohol out of the equation. I need a whole new mindset and friends that are going through or went through similar challenges.

On the contrary, not drinking means you wont decide to avoid the parts in the song writing process that you're uncomfortable with, unsure of, or are just a lot of work for you, and go out to the pub/club. If you even decide to spend 1/4 the time you spent drinking on music, there's no doubt your music will benefit from it greatly. Music is a lot of work at times for the most part, for mainly personal gain, so booze and the rest can tend to call out to people when you're stretching your boundaries.
AA is cool, but I've always thought it was definitely a "take what you can use and leave the rest" thing, some of the dogma should be buried in antiquity, not preached in modernity IMO. The best part of AA is basically having a peer group that actually cares if you don't drink, and will do "uncool" things with you like go to a coffee shop instead of a bar etc. Also a posse of people eventually to go to clubs with etc. that might prevent you from breaking down and drinking.

Good luck, I know I now look back and wonder WTF I was thinking that made it OK if even once a year I blacked out? or got into some stupid argument with my girlfriend drunk, or....

Also, about 3/4 of my friends still drink, it's not a black and white issue.

A agree with take what you can out of AA and not overdue it for the sake of the traditions and for that reason I won't do the 30 in 30 or the 90 in 90. My problem or addiction isn't that severe and there are already times when I've been at my 2 or 3 meetings a week when I find myself getting depressed or pissed off at too much focusing on it.

I know some people that can drink and it makes them super productive but not me. I get absolutely nothing done. I have problems enough procrastinating even when I'm sober.

I've probably tooled around with music more in the last month of not drinking than I did all of 2009.

My sponsor who has been sober 2 years goes to clubs, bars, and karaoke nights and stays completely sober and has a good time. I look forward to getting to that point.

[dredd i knight]

well done! i think its a good idea to prove to yourself that you can stay sober for a self imposed time, but i also firmly believe that "everything in moderation" is the best approach once you proven to yourself that its no longer a crutch. sounds like you have the mental capacity to stay on top of things which is the main thing, so if you can enjoy alcohol or whatever in a way thats pleasurable, social and responsible its the best kind of balance.
this is just me though... my dj partner is an "all or nothing" type character.

[JuanSOLO]

I saw drinking as a pattern I enjoyed but my life really wasn't moving in any kind of forward direction....that whole definition of insanity thing. Then there's the whole hangover thing. I was mostly a weekend binge drinker and maybe once on a weekday.

I also started going to AA for the first time ever. I was initially expecting a depression-fest a la Fight Club but it's nothing like that at all. I've never seen a more boisterous and friendly crowd that wasn't hammered on alcohol or maybe on e would be a better comparison. It was quite alarming at first, especially taking that in sober.

One of my main issues and adjustments to the program is that "go to a meeting" or "read the book" seems to be the default given response to when you do even something as little as glance a little longer than is necessary at an alcohol advertisement. I'm spending more hours hearing about alcohol, talking about alcohol, reading about alcohol, thinking about alcohol, or avoiding thinking about alcohol than I've spent drinking alcohol.

Also a lot of people sharing in the meetings seem to be cases of the extreme. One of the steps is admitting you've hit bottom which I could probably say I've hit my bottom, but by comparison to some of these stories I feel like I'm looking down and bottom is nowhere in sight.

But at the same time this answers one of the most perplexing questions of all alcoholics: How the fuck am I supposed to expand my social circle and enjoy life in the outside world without alcohol? There's a whole world of meaningful friendships and activities that doesn't involve mass doses of social lubricant that I was completely unaware of.

Plus if you've read any of my posts here I can still sound like an idiot that comes off as drunk. Life really doesn't have to change that much.

I quit for 6 years in 2003 by going to NA. I worked at a treatment center for a little over a years a while back. I much prefer NA to AA. I think you get in where you fit in. I dont think one is better than the other, but the vibe is different, and the core fundamentals may seem alike but they are really quite different. I know this for sure, if all you are hearing are war stories and comparisons about drinking and guys telling you to read a book from the 20's. Ask yourself 2 questions, "Am I so scared by abuse that all my mind keys in on are the war stories? Or should I investigate going to a group where they dont share like that."
Remember behind every bottom there is a bottomless pit. My quality of relationships has expanded more that the quantity. That has been a tough thing to realize being addicted to MORE, like more midi controllers, more updates, more software, more options, more durgs. Yes there is a much larger world out there, many folks who could care less about social lubricants, and really know how to enjoy life.

[JuanSOLO]

well done! i think its a good idea to prove to yourself that you can stay sober for a self imposed time, but i also firmly believe that "everything in moderation" is the best approach once you proven to yourself that its no longer a crutch. sounds like you have the mental capacity to stay on top of things which is the main thing, so if you can enjoy alcohol or whatever in a way thats pleasurable, social and responsible its the best kind of balance.
this is just me though... my dj partner is an "all or nothing" type character.

Once you train the mind to rewire itself to behave, feel, think a certian way by and outside mechanism, it takes a lot more than self discapline to rewire the mind.

Addiction is no bullshit, some people are more prone than others for whatever reason.

Some are addicted to hate, some to drugs, some to sex, some to falling in love with idiots,some to being historonic, etc etc etc. The mind can be a stubborn web of neurons that are difficult to create new connections with after years of being set in thier ways.

Self evaluation through working with a sponsor has proven itself thousands of times over more than mere abstinence.

[Machinesworking]

well done! i think its a good idea to prove to yourself that you can stay sober for a self imposed time, but i also firmly believe that "everything in moderation" is the best approach once you proven to yourself that its no longer a crutch. sounds like you have the mental capacity to stay on top of things which is the main thing, so if you can enjoy alcohol or whatever in a way thats pleasurable, social and responsible its the best kind of balance.
this is just me though... my dj partner is an "all or nothing" type character.

Known plenty of people who think like you who ended up in prison, or worse. Not trying to debate you, but word for word your attitude was theirs. Not saying you're the same, doesn't sound like you've been addicted to drugs or alcohol, that's all.

[Sage]

One of the biggest problems in the UK is that the "kids" have it in their heads that abstaining during the week and getting blitzed at the weekends is the way it's done.

We're supposed to be sober during the week?

The issue the UK has is the majority save their money during the week so they can get hammered on the weekend, which seems such a sad existance.

So far in 2010 I've hardly drunk at all, not been for a night out, but the last few nights out in 2009 were very bad experiences. On nights there were things I was meant to be at, I ended up making music all evening. But whether that's down to less alcohol or I'm just feeling more confident with what I'm doing when I'm making music...

[smutek]

Kudos man, 10 years, 2 months here.

Also a lot of people sharing in the meetings seem to be cases of the extreme. One of the steps is admitting you've hit bottom which I could probably say I've hit my bottom, but by comparison to some of these stories I feel like I'm looking down and bottom is nowhere in sight.

"Bottom" is different for everyone. The one common theme is that "bottom" is basically when we decide to stop digging the hole.

For some folks bottom comes when they decide they don't like the way it is effecting their lives, so they stop and it is as simple as that. Others wait until they've run their car into a bus stop full of children and are doing life in prison as a result.

I go to the "other" fellowship, NA, but all 12 step programs and fellowships are nearly identical, especially NA and AA.

There's all sorts of cats in those rooms, most of us are quite dysfunctional and a few certifiably mentally ill, and everyone of them has an opinion. Take what you need from it and leave the rest. The key is to find the people that you groove with and hang with them because there's lots of great people as well.

I learned a lot about myself and the world around me through NA/AA, it's pretty cool.

[synnack]

Good luck! I's been 3 weeks for me. Dr's orders. Liver not doing well so I can't touch alcohol for a while.

WHen the alternative is death, it's easy to not drink. What is hard is the lifestyle choices. My wife is a DJ so I'm in clubs all the time. At work everyone wants to drink at every function, and obviously my own music performances, etc...

That's what sucks. If I'm in a really good mood I can actually go out and have an OK time without drinking but those moods are hard to come by.

In fact right now I am sitting in my hotel in London instead of out out with my friends who live here because sitting around a pub while everyone else has the time of their lives doesn't sound all that great right now.

On the flip side, it is INSANE the amount of money I'm saving on this tour by not drinking.

That brings up another point. I have played sober before, usually when I perform on college radio. But for bigger shows like I'm doing right now, I honestly cannot remember ever being sober on stage. I did it for the first time last week in leipzig. It was really weird. It took a lot longer to actually get into it and break a sweat, but it did happen eventually.

Getting old sucks.

[beats me]

I don't have any kind of delusion that this is a forever thing and I think any support group would tell you that you can't think in those terms. I don't have a set sobriety expiration time frame but what I do have is a determination to enjoy the sober life before I even consider drinking. Right now I'm not enjoying it. I'm just living it. I need to fill my life with people and things that I enjoy sober and once I do that, who knows, maybe I won't want to drink. But I'm not just going to go "I didn't drink for 90 days! Score! Hand me a drink." and made zero other lifestyle changes. That achieved nothing.

Almost all my drinking friends that drink, drink more than me and have more drama as a result than me, so it's kind of ironic that I'm the one in the group seeking help. I'm not a daily drinker or really crave alcohol. I'm the kind of drinker that once I have my first drink it's on until there's no alcohol left or it's a stupid hour of the morning that's not really worth pushing it later. I couldn't tell you how many times in the last year I stayed up to 3 or 4 in the morning mostly listening to music and then spending the entire next day recovering. That's not good.

[Johnisfaster]

One of the steps is admitting you've hit bottom which I could probably say I've hit my bottom, but by comparison to some of these stories I feel like I'm looking down and bottom is nowhere in sight.

That's one of the reasons I never went into AA even though there was a period when I probably could have used it. It's just not personalized to the individual where they are at in their addiction and it just regiments the cure. How many people in there have really hit rock bottom? I hadn't even hit rock bottom when I was drunk every night for a few years. To be honest rock bottom hit me sometime a few years before I ever even had my first drink.

I decided to fix my alcoholism the old fashioned way; find a reason you don't want to be a mess anymore and then use will power to stop being a mess. I don't need alcohol anymore. I still have a beer or 2 most nights but it's usually only 1 or 2. The difference is that I don't think about it all day long, I don't have an insatiable appetite to drink more and more, and if I don't have any alcohol for a few days I don't really miss it much. But contrary to what AA would have told me I can actually have a few drinks. Hell, I can even get drunk once in a while and it doesn't send me off the deep end. It's all about knowing yourself and deciding not to allow something to have power over you.

But of course an AA person would tell me I'm still addicted, but the other day I picked up a beer can and walked around the house holding it all evening and somehow never got around to opening the damn thing (distracted a lot that night) what kind of alcoholic forgets to open a beer?

Learn what you can from those people, but don't take their word as prophecy that's all I'm sayin.

Congratulations though, the first 30 days can be tough.

One thing I can say is that once you truly stop being addicted for a while you'll notice you have a lot more interest in things around you. When I was drunk every night I didn't give a shit about anything. Which kinda sucks but at the time you don't give a shit that you don't give a shit. But it feels good to take interest in things like world news or science or music or whatever. I also don't feel angry all the time anymore, that's probably related too.