musician jokes ... know any good ones?

[Winklepicker]

Q: What do deadheads say when they run out of pot?
A: Dude, what's this awful music?

Haha. Nice one

[Homebelly]

My brother is a drummer.
He's the only one in the family that isn't a musician.

[mojofunk]

Q: Why do people take an instant dislike to dj's?
A: It saves time.

Q: Why do dj's never play hide and seek?
A: Because no one would look for them.

[Z3NO]

Wots got 9 arms and sucks?
Def Leppard.

How many sound engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
1-2, 1-2.

What do you call someone who likes to hang around musicians?
A drummer.

[malutki]

So a Lemur and an iPad walk into a bar.
Nice dim lights, great music, plenty of drinks:
they are having the time of their lives.

They want souvenirs of such a great night,
so they get somone to take pictures.
These turn out really well,
only for some reason the iPad is always much to dark

[MPGK]

Q: What has three legs and an asshole on top?



A: A drum seat.

[H20nly]

So a Lemur and an iPad walk into a bar.
Nice dim lights, great music, plenty of drinks:
they are having the time of their lives.

They want souvenirs of such a great night,
so they get somone to take pictures.
These turn out really well,
only for some reason the iPad is always much to dark

[Pitch Black]

The hardy perennial...

"A DJ who thinks he's a musician is like a milkman who thinks he's a cow."

[funky shit]

The hardy perennial...

"A DJ who thinks he's a musician is like a milkman who thinks he's a cow."

[squelcht]

how other musicians don't know how to use computers.

Check the 'General' section.

Oh SNAP Nice.

[malutki]

So a Lemur and an iPad walk into a bar.
Nice dim lights, great music, plenty of drinks:
they are having the time of their lives.

They want souvenirs of such a great night,
so they get somone to take pictures.
These turn out really well,
only for some reason the iPad is always much to dark

ok, maybe that punch line was too ... you know...


the next pointe should be read like Eddie Murphy, at least I think it is from either raw or delirious:


A strapping playful Mr. Launchpad hooks up with a serious, gorgeous Lady Monome.
they get along really well, until he gets jealous of the hunky Livid Blokes she hangs out with occasionaly.
So he cusses her out, and you can probably guess her indignant reply:
"You nonome! I don't see no ring on your finger!"

ha-Haw!

[H20nly]

no the blown eyes look was because I didn't think we could make any Apple jabs in this thread. I laughed... oh yes, I lol'd

[malutki]

^^^^
yeah, crossing lines a little,
but humor may & must sometimes, plus it was coming from that whole lemur-killer angle and therefor music-related


back OT: everyone knows how a DJ shakes hands, yeah?

[Tysonviolin]

3 musicians and a DJ walk into a bar.........

[alex.the.forge]

A musician walks into a talent agent and tells him about his new band......

<snip>

Agent:what do you call it?

Musician: "the aristocrats!"