i will surely regret posting this...

[beats me]

But kudos to you because usually being a in relationship like that would have forced most guys to sell off all their music gear a long time ago.

Well, thanks. Although, you see, *not* selling it off, other than music making it being therapeutic and creative, is what makes me feel like... well, like this guy:

Dysfunctional relationships are great for the creative juices, but for me it's usually soon after it ended and I'm certainly not still living with the person. I don't think I could put myself in the creative zone if there was always a cloud of resentment hovering over every time I fired up the computer.

[nebulae]

Oh that's easy. It's your balls.

Says the happily married castrated suburbanite.

*hugs*

[nebulae]

But kudos to you because usually being a in relationship like that would have forced most guys to sell off all their music gear a long time ago.

Well, thanks. Although, you see, *not* selling it off, other than music making it being therapeutic and creative, is what makes me feel like... well, like this guy:

Dysfunctional relationships are great for the creative juices, but for me it's usually soon after it ended and I'm certainly not still living with the person. I don't think I could put myself in the creative zone if there was always a cloud of resentment hovering over every time I fired up the computer.

I'm sure there's an app for that.

[stringtapper]

Oh that's easy. It's your balls.

Says the happily married castrated suburbanite.

*hugs*

*ouch*

Careful, I still have the stitches!

[nebulae]

I'm not hugging you down there. Get an ice-pack, man.

[slatepipe]

women man - sometimes they manage to twist arguments totally beyond comprehension and reality

get this - about a month ago our car got nicked. my missus left the keys in the bloody door after she'd used it. so it's not surprising it got nicked really. but because she rang me while she was getting out of the car and i answered and was having a beer with a friend in the pub at the time it somehow became my fault that the car was stolen. because i was drinking it made her forget to take the keys out the door. what... the... fuck???

[mikemc]

women man - sometimes they manage to twist arguments totally beyond comprehension and reality

get this - about a month ago our car got nicked. my missus left the keys in the bloody door after she'd used it. so it's not surprising it got nicked really. but because she rang me while she was getting out of the car and i answered and was having a beer with a friend in the pub at the time it somehow became my fault that the car was stolen. because i was drinking it made her forget to take the keys out the door. what... the... fuck???

exACTly. She was so possessed with the notion that, not only weren't you somewhere suffering-- performing some dronish task as you should've been, but that you were going so far as to have a good time that it pushed everything else out of her head just as she needed to remember the critical car keys! You Audacious BAStard and *accessory* to grand theft, auto!

[stringtapper]

^ that sucks!

What I hate is when they get mad at you for something "you" did *in a dream*, couldn't believe that one! (not the one i married either)

[beats me]

You guys are making it sound like women are fans of issues and blamestorming and not so much fans of solutions or personal responsibility. That just doesn't make sense. How would one find happiness in such a world?

[stringtapper]

You guys are making it sound like women are fans of issues and blamestorming and not so much fans of solutions or personal responsibility. That just doesn't make sense. How would one find happiness in such a world?

[mikemc]

You guys are making it sound like women are fans of issues and blamestorming and not so much fans of solutions or personal responsibility. That just doesn't make sense. How would one find happiness in such a world?

This is an excellent question, it is an American question, because we believe above all in everyone's innate right to seek/pursue happiness-- this right needs no explanation, being self-evident.

And of course, it follows that if "A" has the right to seek happiness, then "B" does, and so neither A nor B can infringe the other's right to seek/pursue happiness, and here is where all the various guidelines, laws and regulations stem from, to ensure that all can seek happiness equally without bonking into one another in a harmful, anti-happy manner.

Now, there is 'ephemeral happiness', and there is 'lasting happiness'. You might say there is a widespread belief that marriage will lead to a more 'lasting happiness', where forgoing some of the 'ephemeral happiness' is part of the condition.

You also might say marriage is the ultimate test of how much two people are willing to bonk into one another in a harmful, anti-happy manner and still feel like they are pursuing happiness, because there is a whole lot of shit you just don't feel like doing. Stereotypes are legend in drama and comedy: for example, if you're the man, doing the dishes. Like, if you're the woman, having sex with the man.

[edit] as to stringtapper's reply, my OS flavor is different but yes, dammit, that is why I want my power supply back, it is a way to happiness.

[beats me]

You guys are making it sound like women are fans of issues and blamestorming and not so much fans of solutions or personal responsibility. That just doesn't make sense. How would one find happiness in such a world?

This is an excellent question, it is an American question, because we believe above all in everyone's innate right to seek/pursue happiness-- this right needs no explanation, being self-evident.

And of course, it follows that if "A" has the right to seek happiness, then "B" does, and so neither A nor B can infringe the other's right to seek/pursue happiness, and here is where all the various guidelines, laws and regulations stem from, to ensure that all can seek happiness equally without bonking into one another in a harmful, anti-happy manner.

Now, there is 'ephemeral happiness', and there is 'lasting happiness'. You might say there is a widespread belief that marriage will lead to a more 'lasting happiness', where forgoing some of the 'ephemeral happiness' is part of the condition.

You also might say marriage is the ultimate test of how much two people are willing to bonk into one another in a harmful, anti-happy manner and still feel like they are pursuing happiness, because there is a whole lot of shit you just don't feel like doing. Stereotypes are legend in drama and comedy: for example, if you're the man, doing the dishes. Like, if you're the woman, having sex with the man.

I don't think marriage can peacefully exist in a society so obsessed with ego and individual accomplishments. I think the numbers will back up that statement.

And having said that, and not to sound like the definitive dude here, but I think society would be a lot more peaceful if the only main purpose the opposite sexes got together is to bump uglies for the fun of it with no desires or expectations beyond that.

[leedsquietman]

I've been married for 10 years.

Even Chuck Norris will tell you, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Forget fighting off 100 Vietnamese, piss off a woman and you're best suits will be cut to shreds and your clothes and suitcase on the front lawn. Try the macho BS and forget about getting any sex or coming to bed, you'll be on the sofa with the cold shoulder for an extended period. Women NEVER forget, you'll be hearing about what an asshole you were for this argument, periodically every time you screw up until you die (along with half a dozen other f*ck ups from a photographic memory of the bad husband playbook you did).

Your choice.

I would take the smart route, apologize and enjoy the make up sex. From what you wrote, it seems like you were worthy of bit of an ass kicking

BTW - all married men are on some kind of defcon, if that is any consolation.

[mikemc]

^ well, as you know, it goes without saying that I should be roundly blamed and harshly condemned for *something*. I'm just trying to figure out what it is.

...not to sound like the definitive dude here, but I think society would be a lot more peaceful if the only main purpose the opposite sexes got together is to bump uglies for the fun of it with no desires or expectations beyond that.

oh, yeh, go ahead and undo countless generations of civilization.

Meanwhile, I asked my wife in what I thought was a reasonable and conciliatory tone what stuff of hers that she thinks I have, because I would gladly return it if she would just let me know what it is.

Didn't work, although I think I did convince her that I would return whatever if I knew what it was, this just caused her to seethe.

As lqm describes, I was regaled with a series of brief summaries outlining assorted past screw ups (years ago and months ago) that demonstrate what an asshole I am and told to go to hell.

anyway, time for be.. uh, couch.

[beats me]

Solution: Go to the store or online and buy another goddamn power supply!

Man, we really tend to over think things here. You may never find out what you took from her but at least you'll show her you have workarounds in life when confronted with a challenge. She should respect you for that...or at least we will.