Is Live 7 Compatible with Abundant Chest Hair?

Discuss music production with Ableton Live.
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nebulae
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Is Live 7 Compatible with Abundant Chest Hair?

Post by nebulae » Mon Aug 13, 2007 5:23 pm

I'm considering lasering off my chest hair. Now those of you who are, for lack of a less descriptive term, cracker-honkies, you won't understand. But for my colored-n-hairy brethren, here are the critical questions to answer:

1. I've heard chest hair is "in" again. Can anyone confirm/deny? And if so, what part of the world do you live in? Because chest may be "in" in NYC but "out" in Berlin.

2. If I do indeed laser off said massive quantities of hobbit-like chest hair, will that hurt the performance of Live 7?

3. Can I sell my hair for money? If so, lasering off may actually deplete an renewable source of income.

People, these are serious questions. An official statement from Ableton on this issue is warranted.

EvilEvil
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Post by EvilEvil » Mon Aug 13, 2007 5:28 pm

Chest hair is an essential ingredient in composing trance masterpieces. One of my mutants shaved his chest and we fired him immediately from EvilEvilEvilEvilEvilEvil records.
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nebulae
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Post by nebulae » Mon Aug 13, 2007 5:30 pm

You know, I bet a few pubes would really help with that much needed phantom power on your inserts. Regardless, good call on firing that loser. Shaving is soooooo 1998.

polyslax
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Post by polyslax » Mon Aug 13, 2007 5:44 pm

It most certainly is not!

However, as one of the lucky (and recently denuded) beta testers of said version I can tell you that the Abes have been hard at work to accommodate those sporting a deep shag frontal forest. It's kind of a good news/bad news situation...

Bad news: no stickers with 7.

Good news: German engineered depilatory cream and tweezers included!
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Martyn
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Post by Martyn » Mon Aug 13, 2007 5:47 pm

I wouldn't worry yourself too much about what's "in" or "out" regarding something like chest hair, who's opinion do you value anyway?
You can't listen to people who think that they're "cool" anymore, everybody knows that they're just idiots who actually worry about what other people think of them and are incapable of thinking for themselves.

My advice is just be yourself, eu natural, as g*d intended, let the hair grow thick to the end of your prick!

If you do let it grow you could twist strands together, wax them to points and set fire to them during a gig. Pirates used to do similar with their beards in order to stike fear into the hearts of young tarnce virgins.

Or somfink.

nebulae
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Post by nebulae » Mon Aug 13, 2007 5:49 pm

polyslax wrote:I can tell you that the Abes have been hard at work to accommodate those sporting a deep shag frontal forest.
I'm hoping Amaury will provide a detailed process for how he plans on supporting this segment of the Ableton customer base. Because let me just say that you don't wanna piss off your hairy contingent.

EvilEvil
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Post by EvilEvil » Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:08 pm

In 1994 at EvilEvilEvilEvilEvilEvil labs, we did developing a prototype "growth" rack for ableton live 6. Did did not specifify what type of growth, but it could be equally beneficial for hairy individuals.

I myself upkeep the most sanitary hygene - there is not a single hair on my body except from my beautiful blonde locks. Essential for any serious producer.
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polyslax
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Post by polyslax » Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:23 pm

Now, if one were to shave the Live logo into their chest hair...

Maybe I could suggest killing 2 birds with 1 stone... depilatory stickers - youch!

Someone with Photoshop handy ought to be able to do a mock-up.
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nate_D
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Post by nate_D » Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:32 pm

polyslax wrote: Bad news: no stickers with 7.
8O
Macbook 2ghz c2d, 2gb ram, osx 10.5.5, live 8.0.8, fw-1884, ms20, x-session, 2xLP

nebulae
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Post by nebulae » Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:37 pm

well, bad news if you're not hairy...good news if you are

Tone Deft
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Post by Tone Deft » Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:46 pm

shaved
Image
but no output


hairy is warmer.
In my life
Why do I smile
At people who I'd much rather kick in the eye?
-Moz

timothyallan
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Re: Is Live 7 Compatible with Abundant Chest Hair?

Post by timothyallan » Mon Aug 13, 2007 8:33 pm

nebulae wrote:cracker-honkies

Ohhhh I didn't know you could hyphenate them! What fun!


You could always do a Before/After story with 60 minutes or something? Get a ltitle publicity out of the deal.

nebulae
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Post by nebulae » Mon Aug 13, 2007 8:37 pm

don't you mean get a little pube-licity?

nebulae
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Post by nebulae » Mon Aug 13, 2007 8:38 pm

(sorry, couldn't resist)

timothyallan
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Post by timothyallan » Mon Aug 13, 2007 8:41 pm

Ohhh our sun browned prodigal son has returned!

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