How the iphone killed my game

beats me · Post by **beats me** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 12:03 am

I went out on a night on the town with a buddy last night. Like a lot of people on here I couldn't care less about the women in these bars and clubs and am more interested in the band, the DJ, the gear, the sound, the jukebox library, etc, but my friend is a disciple of that Mystery guy, the pussy vulture behind the book The Game and the VH1 series The Master Pickup Artist. I found this quite disturbing as the instant we entered the venues he's already sizing up the female population, the best location to get the most female traffic, and ways to strike up conversations. In my opinion this is all part of a master game of let's get rejected as much as humanly possible. I don't head out to hit on women and when I do hit on them I don't work with a wingman.

It turned out to be a rather disappointing evening both musically and with the male/female interaction. As we were leaving I saw an attractive female standing outside the door and I decided to compliment her. She gave me a very sincere "Thank you". As I continued to walk away something in my head clicked and went *fuck it*. I turned back around and said "Can I give you a call some time?". She said "sure". Great. I then proceeded to produce my iphone. For the next minute I looked like one of those assholes showing off the features of the iphone but due to my lack of experience with the phone and my slight intoxication I in fact couldn't figure out how the Hell to add a new contact to the phone. I found this very upsetting. At some point she saw some friends she wanted to say good-bye to and I took that opportunity to leave. That was so not sexy. Damn you Apple!

If you don't find anything in this post worth commenting on, here's a funny article about jukebox selection.

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/55260

Don't tell me you don't feel like a programming genius when making your jukebox selections.

kramerica · Post by **kramerica** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 12:13 am

Wow. I'll give you credit for having the balls to just ask a girl out like that. I need 6 beers or so before I get balls like that.

On the other hand, the iPhone is pretty damn intuitive and you can always just type in the number and call it to make sure you don't lose it. Then she has your digits too. That's how I roll.

timothyallan · Post by **timothyallan** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 12:23 am

I will usually cut the tip of my finger and write on a napkin using the blood.

This way, the chick knows that I mean business, and that I don't need some sissy iPhone to keep track of my numbers.

beats me · Post by **beats me** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 12:43 am

Not that I'm some dating expert, but I find "Could I give you a call some time?" goes over a lot better than "would you like to go out some time?". It's less intimidating and sounds fairly harmless although they essentially mean the same thing. You know women and their word games. "I didn't say I was upset. I said I was mad." Whatever bitch, I mean honey.

That's a good tip about just entering the number and calling it right then to save it and give her yours. I wasn't thinking straight and obvious at the moment. I've also seen people go to the extent of taking a picture of her right then and linking it to the phone number.

The phone is pretty intuitive but as I figured out later there is a little "+" at the top you hit to add numbers. I was looking for something that actually said "add" or something obvious like that.

I suppose writing it with your own blood is another method but I also don't carry around sharp objects with me. Trying to cut my finger with my house key probably would have been more of a turn off than not being able to figure out how to work my iphone.

EgAD · Post by **EgAD** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 1:43 am

beatsme you made me choke on my soggy bowl of captain crunch

that
shit is fuuuneeee, i could just picture it

aqua_tek · Post by **aqua_tek** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 2:33 am

hahaah BOOOOOO!!!

a true player woul've turned his inability to work his new phone into a good way to strike up conversation.

poor poor performance my man. Dont blame the phone!

beats me · Post by **beats me** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 2:53 am

It may have been poor performance in a different situation but it fucked my beautifully simplistic minimalist technique. It was like a movie that goes on way too long.

nebulae · Post by **nebulae** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 3:00 am

Your wing man should never have let this travesty happened. I'll take care of bidness in LA.

forge · Post by **forge** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 3:11 am

timothyallan wrote:I will usually cut the tip of my finger and write on a napkin using the blood.

This way, the chick knows that I mean business, and that I don't need some sissy iPhone to keep track of my numbers.

you've been in Oz too long - hanging out with those nasty Victorian convict bikers like chopper

Beatsme - funny story!

beats me · Post by **beats me** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 3:22 am

I hope you all learned something here. Know your phone. For the first glorious minute I looked like that confident guy that knew what I wanted and just went for it. The following minute I looked like Inspector Jacques Clouseau trying to stop a bomb timer before the clock ran out.

nebulae · Post by **nebulae** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 3:27 am

I bet you looked a lot more like Inspector Gadget

beats me · Post by **beats me** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 4:16 am

nebulae wrote:I bet you looked a lot more like Inspector Gadget

You need to get a job with the Associated Press. There is no topic or comment too obscure for you to respond to with the appropriate picture. I bet you could go an entire week on here responding with the same frequency as you do now except with nothing but pictures.

nebulae · Post by **nebulae** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 4:21 am

beats me wrote:I bet you could go an entire week on here responding with the same frequency as you do now except with nothing but pictures.

sparklepuff · Post by **sparklepuff** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 4:27 am

Oh man, I can't believe you're blaming the phone on this one. Whenever I pull my iPhone out, girls are all up on me "Oh, would you put my number in there, please, PLEASE??" and my favorite "That has internet? Want to see naked pictures of me on my website?"

Also make sure to keep a picture of your 9" weiner as your wallpaper.

Tone Deft · Post by **Tone Deft** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 4:32 am

if nothing else you're keeping your chops up, good work!! keep a pen on you.