NOT HAPPY WITH ANDROID

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 12:52 pm

Been using this for just over a week.

beats me · Post by **beats me** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 1:37 pm

What is it?

And what a kick in Steve's dead nuts.

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 1:43 pm

His Nuts are fine. Got it from work because I had a chance to get one and said "WTF, why not".

Or...rather...after using it =

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 1:45 pm

I'll talk about it a bit more in-depth later, but I can now honestly and unequivocally say...without reservation:

That the Android tablet experience is pure, unadulterated SHIT.

omfg.

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 1:46 pm

o
m
f
g

Every single douchebag tech blogger/reporter who's ever said a kind word about Android should be taken out in the middle of a lonely street and have their head stomped on repeatedly until grey matter coats the asphalt.

And that's being kind.

ffs.

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 1:52 pm

I'm just going to piecemeal this review, because that's much more fun.

1st off:
INTERFACE USER EXPERIENCE.
Rating = SHIT

Oh ffs. You turn it on and can swipe left and right and there's a million fucking choices and navigation buttons - none of which are intuitive and seem to get you to the same choices and options but they just look different or it's a different way to get there or...Who Gives a Shit. They've already lost me and I cannot possibly be bothered to actually look in the fucking manual to figure out what does what.

Christ, Jobs was right: Every non-Apple tablet simply thought it would be cool to reproduce the standard computer experience.

Newsflash: it's not.

omfg

beats me · Post by **beats me** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 3:14 pm

But does it run Flash?

Read that Samsung's lawyers couldn't even visually point out which tablet was Samsung's and which was the iPad when asked to do so in court.

Keep the review coming.

aizo · Post by **aizo** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 3:52 pm

friend of mine has an Experia smart phone and it just randomly restarts. I seen him taking the battery cover off the other day because the damn thing would freeze so much....

hahahahahaha

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 3:59 pm

2nd ITEM OF FUN
BROWSER

o.m.f.g

I don't know what the fuck's doin' here, but the browser is pure SHIT. Because it's not hunting for an HTML5 or even mobile version of a website, you get the 'real' web experience. At least that's what I THINK is happening? Who the fuck knows or cares?

o.m.f.g

Words cannot even begin to describe how shitty the experience is... Every single website you go to renders like ASS. Pixelated, jerky, etc. When you scroll? omfg. It's like watching a movie with a 5sec frame rate. There's this bizarre pixelation that happens all the time.

Flash? Oh my. Oh, oh my. Yeah, there's Flash alright. It's quite apparent and obvious which part of a website is Flash when viewing within Android. Why's that you ask? Because the rendering of the Flash piece is so awful, so shitty, that it looks even worse than the rest of the page.

I kid you not, it's that bad. It's like trying to watch a badly converted movie on your PC where somebody just didn't use the right codec during conversion.

I don't know whether or not there's some setting to clean all this assholishness up, but.....why SHOULD there be?

omfg.

beats me · Post by **beats me** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 4:02 pm

So which tablet is it? And did you have to get that one? Is it the highest rated/reviewed tablet out there that isn't an iPad?

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 4:22 pm

It's the Motorola Xoom - which I think is the best selling non-iPad tablet.

Had to get that one - as most corporate clients that aren't using iPads are buying Xooms.

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 4:23 pm

3rd ITEM OF FUN
MENU ON MAIN PAGE

This relates to the 1st item, but it's appalling that one doesn't have the option of making that FUCKING menu disappear from the screen. Ever. It's always there. True, the buttons fade out and turn into little circles, but still...

Pure. SHIT.

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 4:26 pm

Also, I'm going to just come out and say this right now:

All of you assholes who have ever talked shit about the iPad or iOS in favor of any Android product owe me a personal apology.

I'll overlook the fact that you're fucking INSANE and will endeavor to get you whatever help I can.

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 4:27 pm

In fact, I'm so fucking pissed about all this that it's time to bring out HUGE WONG:

LoopStationZebra · Post by **LoopStationZebra** » Mon Oct 17, 2011 4:28 pm

WARNING:

If viewing HUGE WONG within an Android Browser he may give the impression that he's being viewed on a 1974 color Zenith TV.

NOT HAPPY WITH ANDROID

NOT HAPPY WITH ANDROID

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