Lets build a platinum selling track from scratch

[EvilEvilEvil]

if you are like me and want to be making the platinum hip hop records, here's a guide to help get you started.

What you will need:

1 cassette tape
1 lexicon reverb unit
2 rubber gloves
1 drummer
1 bottle of aspirin
2 jazzlemurs
1 packet of peanuts
1 case of plaster
1 studer tape machine
1 ableton live 6.0 with arpeggiator

first, put on the rubber gloves and turn on the lexicon reverb unit (with the rubber gloves on). Put the rubber gloves away now. Give the drummer the pack of peanuts and have him push the studer tape machine into the wall. After the wall has a dent in it, put the rubber gloves back on. Wait until the drummer finishes the peanuts. It might take a while depending on the drummer. Take half of the can of plaster and dunk the cassette tape into it. Take off one rubber glove and feel the bottom of the can of plaster. Is it as deep as you thought? OK... now take the cassette tape out. Use the other half of the plaster to fill in the dent in the wall. Open ableton live 6.0 with only one rubber glove on. With the left over plaster, coat the bottom of the jazzlemur and run it in fast mode. Empty the can of aspirin into the plaster bucket and put the cassette tape into the (now empty) peanut wrapper. Be sure not to get any aspirin on the gloves. close the lid on the plaster bucket. have the drummer turn off the lemur mutant with the hand that didn't touch a peanut. Close ableton live 6.0. Put on bth rubber gloves and turn off the lexicon reverb unit.

I hope that you following presicely the instruction and are benefitting of it.

[nowtime]

[forge]

where did these god damn bats come from?

[hacktheplanet]

Pack the rubber glove tightly with peanuts.
Rub plaster all over it to make it a bit slippery.
Cram it up your butt.

[hoffman2k]

EvilEvilEvil got pwned!